You Don’t Need to Wait Until Life Calms Down to Take Care of Yourself

How often do you tell yourself:

“I’ll focus on myself when things calm down.”

When work isn’t so busy.
When the children are back in a routine.
When you’ve caught up with the housework.
When you’re sleeping better.
When everyone else is sorted.

It sounds reasonable, doesn’t it?

But the problem is that life rarely becomes completely calm. One busy period ends and something else takes its place. There’s always another job to do, another message to answer or another person who needs something from us.

Before we know it, weeks or even months have passed, and we’re still waiting for the perfect time to take care of ourselves.

I’ve Been Doing It Too

I’ve noticed myself slipping into this way of thinking recently.

I’m now a mum of two, Lottie is still only little, Tommy has just gone back to school and I’m slowly returning to work after maternity leave.

I kept thinking that once the summer holidays were over and we had more of a routine, everything would suddenly feel manageable again.

Of course, that isn’t quite how it works!

I’m now juggling school runs, feeds, broken sleep, client appointments, running a business and all the normal everyday jobs that don’t magically disappear just because I’m trying to find my feet again.

My life has changed, so expecting myself to simply slot back into my old routine doesn’t really make sense.

I’m learning that I don’t need to wait until everything feels organised before I start looking after myself. I need to find small ways to do it within the life I have now.

Self-Care Doesn’t Have to Be Another Job

Sometimes even the words “self-care” can feel like another thing we should be doing.

We see morning routines, gym sessions, perfect meals, skincare rituals and beautifully organised homes and it can make looking after ourselves feel like a whole additional project.

But self-care doesn’t need to be complicated, expensive or time-consuming.

It can be:

• Drinking your coffee while it’s still warm.

• Going outside for ten minutes.

• Taking a few slow breaths before moving on to the next job.

• Saying no to something you don’t have the energy for.

• Asking for help.

• Going to bed instead of continuing to scroll.

• Booking a treatment and allowing somebody else to look after you.

• Taking an hour away from your responsibilities without feeling guilty.

The most helpful form of self-care is often the one you can actually fit into your real life—not the imaginary version where nobody needs you and the washing basket is empty.

Start With What Would Make Today Feel Lighter

When you already feel overwhelmed, asking yourself what you need can feel like another enormous question.

Instead, try asking:

What would make today feel just 5% lighter?

Not perfect.
Not completely stress-free.
Just a little lighter.

Your answer might be taking a short walk, cancelling a non-essential plan, putting your phone away for half an hour or sitting quietly with a cup of tea.

It might be finally booking the appointment you keep putting off.

The answer doesn’t need to be impressive. It only needs to support you.

Try This Simple Reset

If today already feels busy, pause for a moment.

Let your shoulders drop.

Unclench your jaw.

Place both feet on the floor if you can.

Slowly breathe in through your nose for a count of four.

Then gently breathe out for a count of six.

Repeat this five times, allowing your breathing to become softer with each round.

You haven’t removed everything from your to-do list, but you have given your mind and body a moment to pause.

Sometimes that small interruption is enough to help you respond to the rest of your day from a calmer place.

You Are Allowed to Make Space for Yourself

Many of the women I work with spend so much time taking care of everyone else that receiving care can initially feel uncomfortable.

They feel guilty for taking time away from their family, spending money on themselves or leaving something unfinished.

But looking after yourself isn’t selfish.

You don’t have to reach complete exhaustion before your needs become important. You don’t need to earn rest by finishing every job first.

You are allowed to make space for yourself simply because you need it.

September Sanctuary

If you feel as though you need more than a few quiet minutes, our September Sanctuary Dayhas been created to give you a full day away from the usual demands of everyday life.

On Sunday 20 September, we’ll be gathering at the beautiful Art of Wellness Studio at Blackbrook Barns in Lichfield for a day dedicated to movement, relaxation, connection and self-care.

The day includes:

• A woodland walk.

• A mocktail masterclass.

• A light lunch.

• Latin dance.

• Yoga.

• A Temple Spa ritual.

• Meditation and Reiki.

• A positive affirmation close.

It isn’t about adding another commitment to your diary or putting pressure on yourself to achieve something.

It’s an opportunity to step away from everything you normally carry, enjoy new experiences and allow yourself to be looked after.

Sunday 20 September | 10am–6pm
The Art of Wellness Studio, Blackbrook Barns, Lichfield
£65 per person

If this feels like the time and space you’ve been needing, you can book your place below.

BOOK YOUR SEPTEMBER SANCTUARY SPACE

Life might not completely calm down anytime soon.

But you don’t have to wait for it to.

You can begin taking care of yourself right here, in the middle of your real, busy and beautifully imperfect life.

Hayley x
HayLowe Coaching